Staff Reports
In a world where joy is rationed and cheer is criticized, a peculiar phenomenon has hit our collective holiday consciousness as some internet denizens announce that they no longer find Christmas celebratory, or even bearable. A mix of Scrooges and Grinches have taken to platforms like TikTok to mournfully lament the alleged demonic roots of Christmas or bemoan the holiday spirit with Santa-sized disdain. One might surmise that these Christmas cynics see themselves as myth-busting crusaders, bravely uncovering and shedding light on the malevolent underbelly of yuletide festivities. But to eliminate the magic of Christmas over a calendar quibble? Even Scrooge wasn’t that meticulous.
The argument lands that if Jesus wasn’t born on December 25th, then perhaps the whole affair is a grand pagan conspiracy. Tidy up your tinsel, these commentators urge, for backing away from Christmas cheer is the only respectable thing to do now. But here’s a concept that could blow one’s reindeer socks off—perhaps it doesn’t really matter. Christmas, after all, isn’t solely anchored in the precise count of days or historical minutiae. Its roots may contain a jumble of traditions, but that’s precisely what gives it such colorful aplomb. Tradition has a knack for taking the dust of yester-year and spinning it into a glittering festive tapestry, one sweet nativity scene at a time.
No holiday commentary is complete without a dive into the sorrows of jingle-bell skeptics. Some citizens of the internet are not just satisfied with disliking Christmas; they want everyone else to join their carol of chaos. They declare with as much fervor as an elf wrapping presents, arguing that the holiday is overrated and downright intrusive. It’s as if the holiday season’s delightful pomp and circumstance is chalked up as a personal affront. Their festive grumbling is reminiscent of those who gaze at a snow-covered landscape and see only the sidewalk they have to shovel. If misery does indeed love company, these folks are having the worst sort of ugly sweater party by inviting others to join their avalanche of anti-merriment.
Now, onto the intellectual discourse of Santa’s credentials. The jolly man himself has been accused of maintaining numerous aliases and employing a questionable workforce of elves under undisclosed labor contracts. This deep dive into Clausian bureaucracy reveals existential confusion best relegated to the speculative imagination of young children. If Santa’s enigmatic operations perturb the soul, one can only assume this disapproval’s taste is jaded indeed. Cringe away at “Chris Kringle” if one must, but dismissing Claus entirely? Might as well denounce the Easter Bunny; Bad holiday practice can’t be far behind.
Lastly, there are those who tremble at words like “Merry Christmas” for fear they might offend the sensibilities of diverse holiday observers. But let’s be real here, in trying not to offend, they might actually be missing the festive point. The beauty of the season is that it is as much about personal reverence as it is about shared goodwill. The syrupy sweetness of a “Merry Christmas” isn’t just a rote tradition; it’s an invitation for unity, one snow globe shake away from sheer delight. In daring to wish someone a Merry Christmas or even Happy Holidays, the intent is to spread love and joy like snowflakes—unique and fleeting. So, to each his own, but here’s hoping one remembers that holiday cheer isn’t just for December pundits—it’s a little festive nugget designed to warm us all, paganish myths or otherwise.
