Staff Reports
The U.S. Agency for International Development, commonly known as USAID, has officially been put out to pasture, thanks to the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) and its high-profile leader, Elon Musk. On Monday, agency personnel received an email notifying them that the doors were closed—figuratively speaking, of course—while Musk and his crew mapped out a plan for a full-scale shutdown. Apparently, the agency’s leadership decided it was time to turn off the lights and close the curtains on what many have long regarded as a bloated bureaucracy.
This now-defunct agency has been tasked with dishing out a staggering amount of taxpayer dollars to aid countries worldwide, all under the guise of humanitarian efforts. However, after Musk’s conversation with former-President Donald Trump, it seems that the consensus is clear: USAID may simply be too far gone to save. Musk claims that, after scouring through the agency’s operations, it became evident there were not just a few bad apples—but a veritable ball of worms festering at the core of USAID.
History will consider the downfall of USAID as a massive step in bringing down the larger illicit government apparatus we call the deep state.
I don't know about you but I never thought I'd see this day – yet here we are. And it's absolfreakinglutely beautiful.
Thank you,… pic.twitter.com/mEwpGKNATX
— AwakenedOutlaw⚒️ (@AwakenedOutlaw) February 3, 2025
Musk’s colorful analogy of an apple infested with worms has garnered quite a bit of attention. When asked if there was any hope of salvaging the agency, he seemingly tossed that idea out the window faster than anyone could say “government waste.” Instead of opting for minor fixes, DOGE has decided to starkly declare that nurturing a rotten organization back to health just isn’t feasible. With the radical reformation proposal stashed away in the garbage, it appears the only option was to hit the eject button.
Employees of the agency weren’t clapping in celebration about being locked out; over 600 individuals found their access to the system yanked away overnight. Just imagine the confusion at the office on Monday morning—no emails, no functions, and nothing but the smell of strong coffee lingering in an empty headquarters. Meanwhile, those fortunate enough to have remained logged in were met with the ripples of the shocking decision conveyed in the deeply ominous email.
Musk, in his characteristic bravado, referred to USAID as a “criminal organization” that had operated under the radar for far too long. President Trump echoed sentiments of exasperation when discussing the agency’s track record, labeling it a mess run by “radical lunatics.” This decision represents a broader push against what many conservatives see as wasteful spending and an over-inflated government presence interfering in areas it shouldn’t be. With fingers crossed, one can only hope that this shutdown might signal a new era of accountability in government spending and, perhaps, a bee line toward restoring fiscal sanity.
